Monday, October 15, 2012

RE-LEASING MY BURDEN


I was reading the other day.

Seems like I'm doing a lot of reading lately.

Learning, listening, lounging –

And I read something that a friend wrote that really triggered something in my heart.  She was talking about *letting go* of a particularly difficult situation in her life.  About how hard it is for her to do that.  How relinquishing control is often a moment-by-moment process.

How well I relate.

A tired mom, wanting and waiting to release the burden of care that she is carrying.

Yes, I get it.

Those of us who are mothers will totally understand the weight of love and concern that we have for our children.  (By the way, those of you who aren't mothers still care for other people deeply – you will also understand what I'm talking about).

And we should care.

If we ever took that job of mothering seriously, we will care…deeply.

But sometimes we can get overburdened, overwhelmed, overcome by the things we care about.  Especially when we face the ugly fact that we have little control over another person's circumstances, decisions, feelings.

I often find myself being the "emotional burro" of the family.

Might I just say in my defense that I come by that role naturally.

I am the first-born child, and oldest daughter of a first-born son and an only child (my parents).  I am also the first-born granddaughter of two first-born sons – and the oldest cousin in my family.  (Might I just add that both of my parents were also the oldest grandchildren and oldest cousins on one side of their families).

Yup.

Overly responsible.
Overly conscientious.
Overly…everything.

(Sign me up for the counseling couch)

The weight I carry for others – especially for my children – heavy, heavy at times.

Now, as a believer and a follower of Jesus, I know that I am not in charge. (I'm not, right?  Funny how I keep having to check on that…)

The Lord is in infinite control of all things, and all people.

So, I know that my spiritual mandate is to allow Him to have that control. To exhibit my yielding to His sovereignty by trusting and obeying Him.

I really, really try to do that.

But I am struck by the spiritual irony that I am now actually striving to rest.

Silly, huh?

As I pondered what my friend wrote, I thought about that word *release*.

The definition of lease is this (taking out the specific legal stuff so it makes sense emotionally!):

A contract by which one party conveys [something or someone] to another...

In that sense, God is asking me, inviting me to do just that.  To make a contract with Him to convey all my *stuff* to Him.

When I thought about that, releasing my burden actually becomes...

RE-leasing.

Stopping once again to hand over to Him all those things that burden me.

To once again move into that place where I abide with Him.  Where I allow the indwelling of the Holy Spirit to comfort and calm me.  

I re-lease in order to once again find peace.

It's not easy for this crazy first-born.  

Very often I find myself *taking back* all the people and situations that I thought I had given to the Lord.  Evidently, some of the things that I think I "nail to the cross" are actually just thumb-tackedor loosely held on with Post-It notes…

Just sayin'…

But, God is calling this overly responsible, overly conscientious mother to give it ALL to Him.

Yes.

Today, though with a troubled heart and an anxious spirit, I will re-lease it all to Him who loves me.

Hope you can, too.


Is there a burden that God is asking you to re-lease to Him?  


BLOG = "Blessedly Leaning On God!"


2 comments:

  1. This post is vintage Sharon, and I love it. I love the word play with the concept of a lease or contract.

    I've actually been very convicted to release things to His control in the past few months. Maybe I'm finally spiritually growing up to the point that I don't have to hold all my "stuff" so closely.

    Excellent post, Sharon.

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  2. "I am struck by the spiritual irony that I am now actually striving to rest."

    Ditto Debbie - VINTAGE SHARON to be sure! I knew when I finally got myself back into Blogland and over to you on your mountain, you'd have that clever word that would hit me where I'm living. Hence my 6 week absence online - striving to rest - and far too busy in one of those critical seasons. Not out of the woods yet - but truly striving for the balance and to walk this current walk knowing it is not me but HE upon whose shoulders all my responsibilities lie and He is faithful and will do it. Depending upon Him for my next thought - what to do, say, write. Hard work when you work hard.

    But, just as you find contentment in your wooing mountaintop landscapes when you get out there for your walks, I've gotten out of the house the past three weekends and did NOT work through - and found refreshing for my soul in the beauty of God's creation. Looking forward to our woman's retreat in two weeks - by the seaside! Hoping to be dumping stuff into His deep blue sea . . .

    You're a dear, Sharon, and I've missed you. But, I'm back and blogging and it feels great! My "to do" list will get done - in His time and be meet for the purpose. Check out my busy with what I've been blogging about this past week.

    Joy!
    Kathy

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"So [I] have been greatly encouraged in the midst of [my] troubles and suffering, dear brothers and sisters, because you have remained strong in your faith. It gives [me] new life to know that you are standing firm in the Lord. How [I] thank God for you!" (1 Thessalonians 3:7-9)

Thanks for your comments - it is such a joy to be sharing my journey with friends like YOU!

(NOTE: Anonymous comments will be removed. Thank you for understanding.)