PHOTOGRAPHIC MEMORY

So, my sister has been spending time cleaning out some of my mom's drawers.

It's rather amazing what she's accumulated in her 83+ years – and also amazing what she's been able to stuff into drawers!!

Once in a while, my sister comes across a real treasure.

A forgotten piece of jewelry.

A childhood token.

Money.

But the best treasure of all?

Old photographs!

Photos of my mother as a child, me and my siblings as children, and our kids in their childhood.

Precious memories.


As I was looking through some photos that my sister put aside for me, I got to thinking.

Isn't it strange how we can't remember anything from our early years?  Those memories don't belong to us, but rather to our parents and the people who loved us.

Here's an example…

I remember several years ago taking a day trip with my parents.

I drove us to a beach town where my dad had grown up for a portion of his boyhood.  He had so many fond memories there.

We drove around to houses he stayed in, and he told us story after story about people that had lived in the neighborhood – including the man who would shine a huge spotlight into the surf so they could swim until ten o'clock at night!

The general store was still there, and relatively unchanged in 70+ years – the place where he used to buy his candy.

It was a precious time watching his face light up with memories of such good times.

On our way back home, my parents asked me if we could take a quick side trip to the place where they brought me home from the hospital.

Well, sure!

We found it, and just as we were parking our car at the curb, the current tenants drove into the driveway.

Mom and I decided we were going to ask them if we could poke our heads inside.

Dad was mortified, and tried (in vain) to get us to change our minds.

(We left him in the car…ahem!)

So, we walked up the small driveway and approached the people as they were getting out of their car.

They looked at us askance, clearly not wanting to be bothered.

But we persisted.

As I told them why we were there, they smiled and invited us in.

Linked arm in arm, my mother and I entered the little house where I spent my first days of life.

Mom sighed, "It hasn't changed at all."

Then she started pointing things out to me…

"That's the window where we'd put your cradle in the afternoon."

"Here's the kitchen where I washed and prepared your bottles."

"See the sidewalk across the street?  That's where I would walk you in the stroller."


You know, it was a special moment, but kinda eerie.

It was weird to think that I'd actually been in this place, but had absolutely no recollection of it.

And yet, when I looked into the face of my mother, awash with the glow of HER memories of that time with me, I understood something.

Those first few years of our lives do indeed belong to someone else.

Just as the memories I have of my sons in the very beginnings of their lives will always be held in my heart instead of their minds.

I don't know, I thought it was kinda special.

We profusely thanked the people as we walked out.

But then I turned to my mom and said:

"Mom, isn't this the place where Dad backed into the carport on his first day back at work after I was born?"

She grinned.

"Yes, it is."

I grinned.

We wandered down the driveway, and I got to see the infamous carport that has played such a starring role in one of my favorite stories about me being born.

I love that my father, Mr. Have-It-All-Together, was actually kinda thrown by my arrival!!

Good times.

My earliest memory is when I was about 3 years old.

It’s kinda sketchy, but I've verified it with my mom, and I do have the basic details accurate.  My real memories start at about age 4 or 5 – highlights that must have stuck with me because of their meaning.

It's been fun looking at the photos – and sometimes they spur those early memories.

Photographic memory.

Yes.


As I was lying down to sleep last night, I was thinking about those photos, the memories they represent, and the accumulation of moments that a person's life actually is.

Some of it (much of it) is lost to me now.

My memory is pretty good, but even so, it can't contain everything.

But God can – and He does.

I was stilled by that thought.

My entire life – every moment – is firmly implanted in the forefront of His omniscient mind.

He knew all of it before I was born, before the creation of the world.

And He never, ever forgets a thing – never forgets me.

How comforting that thought is to me!

There have been times when I'm watching TV, or attending a huge sporting event, or spending the day at an amusement park – any time I see a crowd of people – and I am overwhelmed by the thought that God knows about every single person's entire life.

Every moment of their history.

All the things that have happened to them.

All the hurts, the joys, the laughter and the tears – their every thought and every feeling.

And He loves each of them.

Just like He loves each of us – as if we were the only person in the whole world.

His love is universal, but also incredibly singular and individually-focused.

I'll never understand it fully.

But I do know this…

He knows me better than I know myself, for He remembers.

The good, the bad, the ugly – my moments are His memories.


I love that the One who created me is the same One who carries me.

From birth to death to eternity – always in His arms.

Never out of His thoughts, ever close to His heart.


And that brings me a comfort and peace that I must always remember…



What's your earliest memory?

Me - First Grade

And yes, I remember this dress!
I loved it!! 

"'I am the LORD, and I do not change.'" (Malachi 3:6, NLT)

"Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change." (James 1:17, ESV)

"…you are always the same; you will live forever." (Psalm 102:27, NLT)

"Jesus Christ (the Messiah) is [always] the same, yesterday, today, [yes] and forever (to the ages)." (Hebrews 13:8, AMP)

"The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness." 
(Lamentations 3:22-23, ESV)

"'I am the Alpha and the Omega – the beginning and the end,' says the Lord God. 'I am the one who is, who always was, and who is still to come – the Almighty One.'" (Revelation 1:8, NLT)

"…the one who watches over you will not slumber.  Indeed, he…never slumbers or sleeps.  The LORD himself watches over you!…The LORD keeps you from all harm and watches over your life.  The LORD keeps watch over you as you come and go, both now and forever." (From Psalm 121:3-5, 7-8, NLT)

"You saw me before I was born.  Every day of my life was recorded in your book.  Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.  How precious are your thoughts about me, O God.  They cannot be numbered!  I can't even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand!" 
(Psalm 139:16-18, NLT)

"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you…" (Jeremiah 1:5, NASB)

"But whoever loves God is known by God." (1 Corinthians 8:3, NIV)

"The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.  Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." 
(Deuteronomy 31:8, NIV)

"'Can a mother forget [her] baby…and have no compassion on the child she has borne?  Though she may forget, I will not forget you!'" (Isaiah 49:15, NIV)

"'I will be your God throughout your lifetime – until your hair is white with age.  I made you, and I will care for you.  I will carry you along and save you.'" (Isaiah 46:4, NLT)

"'…Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.'" (Hebrews 13:5, NIV)



Linked with:

SMALL WONDER, MONDAY'S MUSINGS, MONDAYS AT SOUL SURVIVAL, LIFE GIVING LINKUP, GOOD MORNING MONDAYS, THANK GOODNESS IT'S MONDAY, THE ART OF HOMEMAKING MONDAYS, MAKING YOUR HOME SING MONDAY, MODEST MONDAY, INSPIRE ME MONDAY, LIVING PROVERBS, MOM-TO-MOM MONDAYS, MOMENTS OF HOPE, GLIMPSES LINKUP, TELL ME A TRUE STORY, TITUS 2 TUESDAY, UNITE LINKUP, WONDERFUL WEDNESDAY, TESTIMONY TUESDAY, TUESDAY TALK, RA RA LINKUP, TEACHING WHAT IS GOOD, INTENTIONAL TUESDAY, WISE WOMAN, TELL HIS STORY, CHRISTIAN BLOGGER COMMUNITY, WORD FILLED WEDNESDAY, THREE WORD WEDNESDAY, COFFEE FOR YOUR HEART, COFFEE & CONVERSATION, WOMEN WITH INTENTION, SITTING AMONG FRIENDS, FROM MESSES TO MESSAGES, LOFT LINKUP, GRACE MOMENTS, THANKFUL THURSDAYS, LIVE FREE THURSDAY, THURSDAY FAVORITE THINGS, SHINE BLOG HOP, THOUGHT-PROVOKING THURSDAY, FROM HOUSE TO HOME, GRACE AT HOME, THOUGHTFUL THURSDAYS, LITTLE THINGS THURSDAY, COZY READING SPOT, NO RULES WEEKEND BLOG PARTY, 100 HAPPY DAYS, FUNTASTIC FRIDAY, FRIENDSHIP FRIDAY, EVERYDAY TESTIMONY, FAITH FILLED FRIDAY, SPIRITUAL SUNDAYS, FAITH 'N FRIENDS, GRACE & TRUTH, DANCE WITH JESUS, FRIDAY FEATURE PARTY, MAKE MY SATURDAY SWEET, TGI SATURDAYS, WORD OF GOD SPEAK, WEEKEND WIND DOWN PARTY, SMALL VICTORIES SUNDAY, GIVE ME GRACE



BLOG = "Blessedly Leaning On God!"

A POEM FOR MOM

Mother's Day is this coming Sunday.

I am so glad that my mother is still alive, and this year I am more grateful for her presence in my life than ever before - still my mom, still my friend.

To honor her, and the blessed calling of motherhood, I am sharing a poem I wrote several years ago.

Hope you enjoy it!

A MOTHER

She carries you for nine months,

Then cares for you

Forever...

She watches out for you

when you are young,

Then watches over you

for a lifetime...

She holds you closely in her arms

for a while,

Then tightly in her heart

Always...

She is there through every change,

Then never changes 

herself...

She teaches you about life,

Then lets you leave home...

and live -

A mother is

every gift of God

wrapped up in one person -

Joy, Peace

Patience, Kindness, Goodness

Faithfulness, Gentleness, Self-control

And most of all...

Love.

Though I am no longer a child,

I will always be 

My mother's child

And that is comfort personified -

My mother is

A safe place to be

A soft place to fall

A refuge in every storm...

She calms the winds of life

And helps smooth

the paths

I have chosen to walk.

I have never questioned 

Her love

or her faithfulness,

My faith in her

has never faltered...

She is the sun

that rises every morning,

And the promise

of a new day.

She is

The keeper of secrets,

The spark

to my dreams,

The footsteps

that walk beside me -

She is the one

on the sidelines

who whispers quietly,

with hands

folded in prayer

and

tears in her eyes,

"Go...go...go,

I'm here."

She is 

The quiet heartbeat

that keeps time

with my own...

My mother is

My best friend,

The beacon

of my life...

My mother is home...

© Sharon Kirby

May 10, 2007

I LOVE YOU, MOM!!

What's a favorite memory or moment of yours with your mother?

Her children rise up
and call her
blessed. 

Thank you, Mom, for leading me to Jesus when I was young.

"Listen, O Israel! The LORD is our God, the LORD alone.  And you must love the LORD your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your strength. And you must commit yourselves wholeheartedly to these commands that I am giving you today.  Repeat them again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up.  Tie them to your hands and wear them on your forehead as reminders.  Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates." (Deuteronomy 6:4-9, NLT)


And thank you, Mom, for always showing me how to follow Him.

"Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it." (Proverbs 22:6, NLT)

**********

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY to all of you wonderful moms out there!!

**********

Linked with:

SHARING HIS BEAUTY, SMALL WONDER, MONDAY'S MUSINGS, MONDAYS AT SOUL SURVIVAL, LIFE GIVING LINKUP, GOOD MORNING MONDAYS, MONDAY OF MANY BLESSINGS, THANK GOODNESS IT'S MONDAY, THE ART OF HOMEMAKING MONDAYS, MAKING YOUR HOME SING MONDAY, MUSING MONDAYS, MODEST MONDAY, MOTIVATION MONDAY, INSPIRE ME MONDAY, LIVING PROVERBS, REFLECT LINKUP, US, COFFEE & JESUS, TELL ME A TRUE STORY, UNITE LINKUP, TITUS 2 TUESDAY, TESTIMONY TUESDAY, TUESDAY TALK, TELL IT TO ME TUESDAYS, RA RA LINKUP, TEACHING WHAT IS GOOD, INTENTIONAL TUESDAY, WISE WOMAN, THE HOMEMAKING PARTY, TELL HIS STORY, WHOLEHEARTED WEDNESDAY, A LITTLE R & R WEDNESDAYS, WORD FILLED WEDNESDAY, THREE WORD WEDNESDAY, COFFEE FOR YOUR HEART, COFFEE & CONVERSATION, WOMEN WITH INTENTION, WAITING ON WEDNESDAY, SITTING AMONG FRIENDS, WEDDED WEDNESDAY, ONE WORD COFFEE, WINSOME WEDNESDAY, GRACE MOMENTS, THANKFUL THURSDAYS, THURSDAY FAVORITE THINGS, LIVE FREE THURSDAY, PARTY AT MY PLACE, SHINE BLOG HOP, THOUGHT-PROVOKING THURSDAY, FROM HOUSE TO HOME, THOUGHTFUL THURSDAYS, GRACE AT HOME, LITTLE THINGS THURSDAY, COZY READING SPOT, NO RULES WEEKEND BLOG PARTY, 100 HAPPY DAYS, BLOGGER SPOTLIGHT PARTY, FRIENDSHIP FRIDAY, EVERYDAY TESTIMONY, FAITH FILLED FRIDAY, SPIRITUAL SUNDAYS, FAITH 'N FRIENDS, MAKE MY SATURDAY SWEET, GRACE & TRUTH, DANCE WITH JESUS, TGI SATURDAYS, FAMILY, FRIENDSHIP & FAITH, FUNTASTIC FRIDAY, GROWING IN GRACE, WONDERFUL WEDNESDAY, WEEKEND WIND DOWN PARTY, LET US GROW, WORD OF GOD SPEAK, SMALL VICTORIES SUNDAY, GIVE ME GRACE, SOCIAL BUTTERFLY SUNDAY




BLOG = "Blessedly Leaning On God!"

LETTING GO OF MY KIDS

OK, to be totally honest, my sons are not kids anymore.

At 32 and 28, they are men.

But, as any parent knows, your kids are your kids are your kids…

They certainly grow up, but your heart still holds on tight.

Ya know?!


I have found that the journey of parenthood is a series of *letting go* moments.  From the moment a child is born, we learn to negotiate the stages of their development and growth into independence.

Most of the time, it's an exciting journey.

Sometimes it's the hardest thing a person will ever have to do.

It is really hard to love so intensely.  

It is really hard watching your children make their own decisions, especially when you feel like they could be potentially wrong decisions.  It is really hard to watch them go through painful circumstances, and to see them feel sad or discouraged or upset.  It is awful to watch them when they're sick or injured.

And, the older they get, the less and less you feel like you can do anything about any of it.


It's ironic to me in some ways that we work so hard to raise our children to leave us one day.  That our primary goal is to bring these little ones into mature adulthood, and that independence is a character trait to be nurtured and instilled.

I don't know about you, but some part of me had to work hard at this.

Because the truth of the matter was that there was a part of me that never wanted my boys to hurt.  I never wanted them to be sad.  I didn't want them to struggle, to make mistakes, to find out how tough life can really be sometimes.  And, truth be told, there was a part of me that never wanted them to leave.

I did, but I didn't.

And this is the tug/pull hanging on, and the push/prod spurring on that summarizes the bittersweet dance of parenting.


Let me tell you, I am very close to my two sons, a blessing for which I am very grateful.

But it's still so hard to watch them when they go through difficult things.  I have always been known as a helicopter mom.  (Definition: a parent who takes an overprotective or excessive interest in the life of their child or children).  In fact, my sons have occasionally been known to call me "Whoop, Whoop" – (insert sound of rotor blades here).

I try hard not to meddle, to give advice only when asked, to be a support and not a nag, to release them to their own lives.

But that is the hardest thing for me, really – to release them into their own stories, their own journeys, and their own walks with the Lord.


Years ago, my old church had a wonderful Good Friday service.  Maybe some of you have had this experience, but it was totally new to me.  At the end of the message, everyone was asked to write down something that we wanted to give up, to hand over to the Lord.

I wrote down the names of my sons.

Then we walked down the aisle, picked up a hammer, and nailed that symbolic piece of paper to the cross.

In retrospect I think perhaps I must have only used a thumbtack – maybe even a post-it note.  Because I still find it nearly impossible to yield those boys to the Lord, and I just keep *taking them back*.


I have long struggled with the story of Hannah in the Bible.  Hannah, who was so desperate for a child, who agonizingly prayed to the Lord for this gift of life, who promised that if she gave birth to a baby she would give that child back to the Lord.

Well, you know what happened.  

God did indeed give her a child, Samuel.  And Hannah stayed true to her promise.  When Samuel became a certain age, Hannah brought him to the temple and handed him over to Eli, the priest, to be trained in the ways of the Lord.

True confession?

I'm uncomfortable with Hannah's story.  

While I completely admire her for her dedication, her selfless character, her unswerving commitment to honor the Lord with this most precious gift – there's my *mother's heart* that just agonizes over her decision.

I picture that day when she kissed Samuel and said good-bye.

O.U.C.H.

I'm not sure that I could have done that.

But, there's the rub.

And by rub, I mean the Holy Spirit convicting me!

Rubbing up against my earthly flesh, rubbing off the rough edges, rubbing to polish the parts that don't reflect the Lord so well.

Because whatever is nearest and dearest to your heart, whatever is your passion, whatever you treasure most – THAT is what God is going to ask you to surrender to Him.


Jesus counseled His disciples to count the cost of following Him.  And then He told them that if they truly wanted to follow Him, they'd have to pick up a cross.

Cross-carrying is not for the faint of heart.  It is a courageously painful journey of surrender that does NOT come naturally to our self-serving ways.

IT. HURTS.

Because, after all, dying to self is excruciating.

(Did you know that the root word for excruciating comes from the Latin word, excrucitus, which is equivalent to ex + cruciāre  - meaning to torment, crucify – a derivative of crux = cross)

And just as sure as I am that God will ask us to surrender the most hard-to-yield things (or people), I also know that the enemy of our souls will tempt and taunt and poke and pester us in this area more than anywhere else, because this is where we're most vulnerable.

Yes, the enemy will go after the things that we love.

He'll make surrendering feel like losing control.

I know this because it happens to me all the time.

The harder I try to give my kids over to the Lord, the more the devil entices me to tighten my grip.  The harder I try to relinquish them to their Father's care, the more the enemy increases my reluctance to let them go.

It's a foolish, yet viciously tenacious battle.

In the end, the thing that I don't like hearing from people – that my sons belong to the Lord, and they are only loaned to me – in the end, that is Truth.

And, no matter how much I love those boys, my heavenly Father loves them more.


So, what is God speaking to your heart today?

What is He calling you to surrender?

Maybe you're like me.  

Maybe the hardest thing to give over to Him is your kids.  Maybe you struggle with their burgeoning independence, and the ability to make choices and decisions that could be oh-so-wrong.  Maybe you ache over their pain and suffering.  Maybe you wish you could keep them from all the hard stuff of life.

Maybe you wish you could spend your life "whoop-whooping" over them.

Hovering, protecting, guarding.


But, God is calling…

Calling you to surrender them into His care.

It's OK.  He knows how hard it is.  He understands.

For He gave His only Son – the Son that He loved perfectly – He gave that precious Son over to death.  And if He loved us enough to do THAT, He'll surely take care of us all the days of our lives.

And that includes my two sons, whom I adore.

And because I adore them, I will continue to surrender them to the One who loves them more…


Lord, give me the courage to relinquish my sons to You.  To let You do Your work in their lives, no matter where their journey takes them.  Help me to not be afraid, and to trust in Your perfect love for them.  Give me wisdom in my relationships with each of them.  Enable me to be a good counselor when advice is asked for.  And to keep my words to myself when I am tempted to be meddlesome.  Teach them to follow You in all their ways.  Thank You for bringing them into my life, and for the great joy they bring me.  And yet, I also ask that You empower me to surrender them, to let go, to relinquish my control, and to trust YOU with every moment of their lives.


Thank You that You love them more than I do…and thank You for loving me.

Please tell me that you notice
the "helicopter rotor blade" arm
that I have wrapped
around the shoulders of my sons!

Whoop, whoop!! 

"Behold, children are a gift of the LORD..." (Psalm 127:3, NASB)

"I asked the LORD to give me this boy, and he has granted my request.  Now I am giving him to the LORD, and he will belong to the LORD his whole life." 
(1 Samuel 1:27-28, NLT)

"'Now suppose one of you fathers is asked by his son for a fish; he will not give him a snake instead of a fish, will he?  Or if he is asked for an egg, he will not give him a scorpion, will he?  If you then...know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give...?'" 
(Luke 11:11, NASB)

"'Can a mother forget her nursing child?  Can she feel no love for the child she has borne?  But even if that were possible, I would not forget you!'" 
(Isaiah 49:15, NLT)

"'[Jesus] said to them, 'Let the children come to me.  Don't stop them!'" 
(Mark 10:14, NLT)

"Casting the whole of your care [all your anxieties, all your worries, all your concerns, once and for all] on Him, for He cares for you affectionately and cares about you watchfully.'" (1 Peter 5:7, AMP)

"'I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand.  My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all, and no one is able to snatch them out of the Father's hand.'" 
(John 10:28-29, ESV)



What, or whom, is God asking you to surrender to Him today?



Linked with:

SHARING HIS BEAUTY, PLAYDATES WITH GOD, SMALL WONDER, MONDAY'S MUSINGS, MONDAYS AT SOUL SURVIVAL, GOOD MORNING MONDAYS, GRATEFUL HEART MONDAY, REFLECT LINKUP, WORDS WITH WINTER, THE ART OF HOMEMAKING MONDAYS, WORDS OF COMFORT MONDAY, MOM 2 MOM MONDAY, TELL ME A TRUE STORY, UNITE, SOLI DEO GLORIA, TITUS 2 TUESDAY, LIFE GIVING LINKUP, TESTIMONY TUESDAY, TELL IT TO ME TUESDAYS, WOMEN HELPING WOMEN, TUESDAY TALK, RA RA LINKUP, INTENTIONAL TUESDAY, TELL HIS STORY, A LITTLE R & R WEDNESDAYS, WHOLEHEARTED WEDNESDAY, COFFEE & CONVERSATION, SO MUCH AT HOME, WORD FILLED WEDNESDAY, THREE WORD WEDNESDAY, COFFEE FOR YOUR HEART, WISE WOMAN, WOMEN WITH INTENTION, WAITING ON WEDNESDAY, JOYHOPELIVE LINKUP, THE (NOT JUST) HOMEMAKING PARTY, THURSDAY FAVORITE THINGS, THOUGHT-PROVOKING THURSDAY, FROM HOUSE TO HOME, LOOKING UP LINKUP, EVERYDAY JESUS, GRACE AT HOME, THOUGHTFUL THURSDAYS, LITTLE THINGS THURSDAY, HEARTS FOR HOME, SHINE, FRIENDSHIP FRIDAY, THEOCENTRIC THURSDAYS, FELLOWSHIP FRIDAY, EVERYDAY TESTIMONY, FAITH FILLED FRIDAY, SPIRITUAL SUNDAYS, COUNTING MY BLESSINGS, MAKE MY SATURDAY SWEET, GRACE & TRUTH, TGI SATURDAYS, DANCE WITH JESUS, SATURDAY SOIREE, SATURDAY STILLNESS, WEEKEND WHISPERS, LIVING PROVERBS, SUNDAY STILLNESS, GIVE ME GRACE



BLOG = "Blessedly Leaning On God!"

WATCHING A MIRACLE UNFOLD

Yes.

This is what it feels like.

Wanna hear about it?!

As many of you know, a little over two years ago, life changed.  It was at that time that it became very apparent to my siblings and I that we needed to step into our parents' lives.

We began a sort of tag-team visitation schedule that continued until my dad fell and landed in the hospital.  Ten days later, he passed away.  This left my mom all alone, after nearly 62 years of marriage.  She was so very scared, so we spent the first six months or so after Dad's death shuttling her around.

This worked for a while, but then everyone became exhausted.  So, we went back to a visitation schedule, with days that Mom spent on her own.  A few months ago, as Mom became increasingly more fearful and confused, we knew we needed to do something more.

But…WHAT to do?

Mom wanted desperately to stay home, and yet, she didn't want to be alone. The dilemma arose when she also wasn't keen on having a *stranger* come in to help out.

Oh, the prayers that went up to heaven in the last several months.

Until…

Until God intervened, and we saw a miracle unfold.


Watch the dominoes fall...

A few months ago, I was down visiting my mom, and I got really sick (domino #1).  Too sick to drive home on the day I had planned to leave.  I stayed a few extra days (domino #2).

Because I was still in town, my brother opted not to come over to Mom's on his "regular" day (domino #3).  Instead, on the spur of the moment, he decided to head down the coast to an outlet store to buy some hiking boots (domino #4).

While there, he decided to try to have lunch with one of our cousins (domino #5).  (My sibs and I have only three first cousins – Dad being one of two sons, and my mom being an only child.  Therefore, we are more like siblings than cousins!)

She was having lunch with our other cousin, and my brother joined them (domino #6).

Of course, they asked all about how their special Auntie was doing.

My brother related some of the struggles we were facing (domino #7).

A bit later in the conversation, my brother asked one of my cousins how her job was going at a local surgical center (domino #8).  (She went back to school to become an R.N. after her boys were grown). 

She then informed him that she wasn't doing that anymore.  She was now working as the RN Case Manager for a company that does in-home caregiver placement for the elderly (domino #9).

I think time stopped at this point…

(I know if I'd been there I would have heard a choir break out into singing!!)

She offered to help us find a caregiver for Mom.  

Incidentally, she mentioned that if this lunch had happened a very few weeks later, she would not have been able to personally help us, as a new franchise was opening in Mom's county, precluding her ability to manage Mom's case (domino #10).


Fast forward to last week.

One thing after another fell rapidly into place, and my mother now has a wonderful Christian woman spending time with her.  

A woman who *just happens* to have lost her own mother.

A woman who *just happened* to hear about a job opportunity through someone she knew, who *just happened* to hear about it from our cousin.

A woman who *just happens* to have experience taking care of elderly people with cognitive challenges.

A woman who in her interview *just happened* to mention her father's passing, and how they played his favorite song at his funeral – "Great Is Thy Faithfulness."  A song taken from Lamentations 3:23.  A verse that *just happens* to be on my dad's headstone.

A woman who *just happens* to be supervised by our cousin, who will personally be managing my mom's case and visiting her on a regular basis.

A woman who *just happens* to be able to cover all the shifts with Mom.

A woman who has stepped into our lives like she's always been there.


My family is standing in awe.

Rarely have I seen such a direct answer to prayer.

I am humbled by it, so very grateful for it – still standing in disbelief at how this has all worked out so perfectly.

The other night, I was talking to another cousin (who has been part of our *care team* for Mom).  We were talking about the *miracle* of this whole situation.

And then she said something that has really stuck with me.

She said, "You know, Sharon, very few people get to see something this miraculous happen.  Few get to see an answer to prayer so directly linked to God's intervention.  I tell you what.  I told Him the other night that no matter what He asked me to do in my life going forward, I would do it.  I am His servant."

After I got off the phone, I couldn't stop thinking about what she said.

First of all, I am rather stunned at all the *just so happened* moments in this journey.  At each turn in the road, there was something that "just happened" right when it needed to happen.  

Like a wonder-full chess match, God was moving each piece into place.  

God works = CHECKMATE!!


I have seen His hand at work like that over and over again in His Word.  

The Bible is full of these moments:

"Now it happened at the end of two full years that Pharaoh had a dream…" (Genesis 41:1, NASB) – Joseph

"Then Abraham raised his eyes and looked, and behold, behind him a ram caught in the thicket by his horns…" 
(Genesis 22:13, NASB) – Abraham

"Now the daughter of Pharaoh came down to bathe at the river…She saw the basket among the reeds…" 
(Exodus 2:5, ESV) – Moses

"Now the LORD had arranged for a great fish to swallow Jonah." 
(Jonah 1:17, NLT) – Jonah

"Who knows if perhaps you were made queen for just such a time as this?" 
(Esther 4:14, NLT) – Esther


Even in the life of Jesus and His disciples, there were many, many *just so happened* moments.

Yes, at each twisty turn in His life, there was Someone at work.

The same Someone who is at work in our lives.

There are no coincidences in the believer's life – these moments are *God appointments* – divinely orchestrated by the wise Providence of our Lord.

Not serendipity – but sovereignty.


Now, the other thing that I've really been pondering is this:

When I hung up the phone I thought to myself, "Yes, you have seen a miracle.  Now what are you going to do about it?"

I've been pondering.

What did people do when they saw the miracles of Jesus?

Reactions were mixed.


Some were grateful, others were thankless.

(Remember the ten lepers who were healed?)  

"One of them, when he saw that he was healed…fell to the ground at Jesus' feet, thanking him for what he had done…Jesus asked, 'Didn't I heal ten men? Where are the other nine?'" (Luke 17:15-17, NLT)


Some were awed, others were skeptical.  

"But despite all the miraculous signs Jesus had done, most of the people still did not believe in him." (John 12:37, NLT)


Some wholeheartedly believed that He was who He said He was.  They instantly grasped onto His offer of salvation.

"And many who were there believed in Jesus." (John 10:42, NLT)


Others were threatened by Him, and began plotting to kill Him.

"Then the Pharisees went out and began to plot with the Herodians how they might kill Jesus." (Mark 3:6, NIV)



So, what am I going to do?

Praise Him, thank Him – of course.

Tell others about it – yes indeed.

But I want to do more than that.

I want this Divine Intervention to infuse my faith with more faith.

I want it to make a difference in how I trust God.  

I want it to deepen my understanding of God's faithfulness.

I want it to bring me peace as I face other turmoil in my life.

I want to KNOW more than ever, that God is in control, that He still sits on His throne, that His ways are wise and good and timely.

I want to believe…

Oh Lord, please help my unbelief.


I cannot end this post without one last perfect moment.

My mom's new caregiver has a name very similar to a member of our family, sometimes confusing my mom.  My sister was joking with her about it the other day.  The caregiver suggested, a bit tongue-in-cheek, that we could always call her by her middle name.

"What is your middle name?" my sister asked.

Are you ready for it?

"Oh,” she answered, "It's Grace."

Well yes, of course it is!

God, You are amazing.

Sweetest Mommy.

Full of Joy.

Blessed by Love.

Watched over by Grace. 

"It is because of the Lord’s mercy and loving-kindness that we are not consumed, because His [tender] compassions fail not.  They are new every morning; great and abundant is Your stability and faithfulness." 
(Lamentations 3:22-23, AMP)

"Blessed be the Lord, Who bears our burdens and carries us day by day, even the God Who is our salvation!" (Psalm 68:19, AMP)

"Commit everything you do to the LORD.  Trust him, and he will help you...Be still in the presence of the LORD, and wait patiently for him to act...Day by day the LORD takes care of the innocent...The LORD directs the steps of the godly.  He delights in every detail of their lives.  Though they stumble, they will never fall, for the LORD holds them by the hand...He will keep them safe forever...The LORD rescues the godly...He saves them, and they find shelter in him." (From Psalm 37, NLT)

"Cast your burden upon the LORD and He will sustain you; He will never allow the righteous to be shaken." (Psalm 55:22, NASB)

"Casting the whole of your care [all your anxieties, all your worries, all your concerns, once and for all] on Him, for He cares for you affectionately and cares about you watchfully." (1 Peter 5:7, AMP)

"Lean on, trust in, and be confident in the Lord with all your heart and mind and do not rely on your own insight or understanding.  In all your ways know, recognize, and acknowledge Him, and He will direct and make straight and plain your paths." (Proverbs 3:5-6, AMP)

"And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them." (Romans 8:28, NLT)

"Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think...to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations forever and ever.  Amen." (Ephesians 3:20-21, NASB)



Have you ever witnessed a miracle?  Please share your story!



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BLOG = "Blessedly Leaning On God!"

HAMSTER SURGERY

OK, yes, this has a backstory.

Years ago, my sons had hamsters.  Cute and cuddly little guys. 

We (I) enjoyed taking care of them – cleaning out the cage, changing the water, making sure they were fed.

But, there came a day when we faced a dilemma – vacation.

Obviously we couldn't take the critters with us – even though this decision was vociferously opposed. 

So, what to do?

Well, I decided to do what I always did when I needed some extra help – I asked Mom.

My mom is the best.  She was the only babysitter that I ever had for my kids.  I was lucky.  She lived close by – and I actually think she just might have sat by the phone all the time waiting for the opportunity to *watch the boys!*

I called her.

"Mom, would you be willing to watch the hamsters for us while we're gone on vacation?"

"Of course."

Then I shared with her how one of the hamsters had some sort of skin thing growing on his back.  It was making me nervous, and I didn't know what to do.

Mom, precious Mom, had an immediate answer:

"Don't worry.  I'll take care of it."

So, cages and food and sawdust and bedding fluff was dropped off at Mom's house – oh, and also two little furry bundles of fun.

And we left on vacation.

When we came back home, I called my mom to make arrangements to pick up the hamsters.  And to see how the "skin thing" was doing…

And then I found out what my mom had done.

In our absence, she had found and called a local vet by her house.  She had taken the hamster in for a visit.  And then, she had decided to have the vet perform surgery on the hamster to remove the growth.

Yes, surgery.

On a hamster.

Surgery that cost her (way back then) over $300!!

I couldn't believe it.

Mom had done an incredible thing.  I was amazed, though I shouldn't really have been.  My mom is just that sort of person.

I write about this story because I was thinking about it the other day.  I can still vividly remember the sense of relief I had handing over those hamsters to Mom.  Total peace of mind, no worries – calm thoughts and calm heart.

The reason I was thinking about this is because of the struggles that I've had lately letting go of stuff.

I pray – oh boy, do I ever pray!  But I just can't seem to let go.

I want so desperately to have that same peace of mind that I had with my mom.  I want to know that serenity.

So, I started thinking about WHY I was able to have peace about the hamsters.  Here's what I came up with:

1.  I completely trusted my mom.  I knew that I could count on her, that I could leave something in her care, and not give it a second thought.  I was well-acquainted with her character, and she had always proven trust-worthy. 

2.  Mom knew me in-and-out.  I knew that she wouldn't do anything to hurt me.  She would handle the situation just like I would.  She would do the right thing.

3.  Mom understood my heart.  She always cared about what I cared about.  The things that were precious to me were precious to her.  My concerns were hers, and my heartaches were borne in her heart, too.

4.  Mom was willing to take on the responsibility of taking care of things.  She shouldered the burden instead of me.

5.  Whatever it took, whatever the cost, Mom would do it out of love for me.  Her deepest desire was to bring me joy.

OK, that's a good list.

So, I'm asking myself – do I feel the same way about God?

The most honest answer I can give to this question is – yes and no.

I agree that all the things I said above about Mom also apply to God, too.

But, here's the rub.

Sometimes God lets things happen that are terribly difficult, painfully sad, achingly confusing…

In other words, not everything that God lets happen in my life is good.

(At least not by my definition).

Yes, He is trust-worthy.  Yes, He knows me in-and-out.  Yes, He understands my heart and cares about what I care about.  Yes, He has promised to bear my burdens.  And yes, He did what it took, paid the cost, just to bring me joy.

But I am not always joy-full.

So I have to admit that in the way that I live out my life, I do not trust God to guard me from suffering.

O.U.C.H.  

(Honesty hurts…)

A few years ago in Bible Study, I heard this thought (my paraphrase):

Whether God will or will not do something is up to Him.  Our part of the bargain is to decide whether we believe He is ABLE.

And, my friends, that is the crux of my problem.

I do believe with my whole heart that God is able to do anything – even the impossible.

But, when He doesn't do something that I think He should or could, what then?

Is He still good and worthy to be trusted?

Life, and the enemy of my soul, work very hard to convince me otherwise.

But, unless I'm willing to give up on Truth, I have to believe that God is trustworthy.  I cannot tolerate any inkling that He is a cruel despot or uncaring observer.

So what to do?

Here's some thoughts that I've come up with:

1.  Trust really isn't trust when things are going good.

2.  Trust becomes true trust when it is tested.

3.  Trust continues to believe in something or someone even when things go wrong.

4.  Trust is relying on someone’s character and not on the outcome of circumstances.

5.  Trust is believing something contrary to our feelings.

6.  Trust refuses to be side-tracked by lies.

7.  Trust should be based on what God has done in the past, and what He will do in the future – (think *the cross* and *eternal life*) – not on the current struggles.

And finally, trust must go beyond my own understanding of things.  If God is God, and I believe He is, He WILL do the best and good and perfect thing in my life...

EVEN. IF. IT. HURTS.

That is Truth, and that is Trust.

I'm asking the Lord to grant me the same peace of mind that I so remember from that episode with hamster surgery.  I am craving the same release from fear and worrying.

For I do know that He loves me – actually way more than even my mom does.

He died for me.

Oh, I can picture myself sitting at the foot of the cross, looking up at the broken body of a Savior, desperately searching His swollen and pain-filled eyes for some sense of peace.

And then, if I am quiet in my soul, I can hear Him whisper, inaudible to anyone else but me:

"Don't worry.  I'll take care of it."

And in tears, I know it's true.

He is the Great Physician.
The Master Healer.
The One who restores
the crushed in spirit,
and mends
the broken heart. 

"When the righteous cry for help, the LORD hears and delivers them out of all their troubles.  The LORD is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.  Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the LORD delivers him out of them all." (Psalm 34:17-19, ESV)

"He heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds." (Psalm 147:3, NLT)

"'The Spirit of the LORD is upon me, for he has anointed me to bring Good News to the poor.  He has sent me to proclaim that captives will be released, that the blind will see, that the oppressed will be set free...'" (Luke 4:18, NLT)

"'Healthy people don't need a doctor - sick people do.  I have come to call not those who think they are righteous, but those who know they are sinners.'" (Mark 2:17, NLT)

"...he healed all the sick.  This fulfilled the word of the Lord through the prophet Isaiah, who said, 'He took our sicknesses and removed our diseases.'" (Matthew 8:16-17, NLT)

"And [Jesus] went throughout all Galilee, teaching in their synagogues and proclaiming the gospel of the kingdom and healing every disease and every affliction among the people." (Matthew 4:23, ESV)

"When Jesus landed and saw a large crowd, he had compassion on them and healed their sick." (Matthew 14:14, NIV)

"'Are you the one who is to come, or shall we look for another?'  And Jesus answered them, 'Go and tell...what you hear and see: the blind receive their sight and the lame walk, lepers are cleansed and the deaf hear, and the dead are raised up, and the poor have good news preached to them.  And blessed is the one who is not offended by me.'" (Matthew 11:3-6, ESV)

"By his wounds you have been healed." (1 Peter 2:24, ESV)

"Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed.  The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working." (James 5:16, ESV)

"He will swallow up death forever; and the Lord GOD will wipe away tears from all faces...for the LORD has spoken.  It will be said on that day, 'Behold, this is our God; we have waited for him, that he might save us.  This is the LORD; we have waited for him; let us be glad and rejoice in his salvation.'' 
(Isaiah 25:8-9, ESV)

"I heard a loud shout from the throne, saying, 'Look, God's home is now among his people!  He will live with them, and they will be his people.  God himself will be with them.  He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain.  All these things are gone forever.'  And the one sitting on the throne said, 'Look, I am making everything new!'...And he also said, 'It is finished!  I am the Alpha and the Omega - the Beginning and the End.'" (Revelation 21:3-6, NLT)

Amen and amen!



In what ways do you struggle with trusting God completely?



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BLOG = "Blessedly Leaning On God!"